Idol factories

“The human heart is a factory of idols…Everyone of us is, from his mother’s womb, expert in inventing idols.” John Calvin

Idolatry has come up quite a bit in my conversations with Katie recently. As we read in her children's Bible, she is quick to point out when people are worshipping "fake gods." She says, "That's silly...there's only one real God." We've also gotten into the 10 commandments part of her catechism, so the two questions we've worked on this week were: "What is the first commandment?" and "What does the first commandment mean?" (Answers: "You shall no other gods before me." and "Worship God only.")

But our conversations have not been mainly theoretical. No, unfortunately, idolatry has become a rather personal issue. We've recently had a lot of battles over Katie throwing a fit when we have to turn off a movie she's watching...even when she's been given fair warning and we've reminded her not to throw a fit when we have to turn it off. I've tried to help her identify the heart issue at hand: "When you throw a fit when we turn off the tv, you are being like the people in the Bible who love fake gods more than the real God. You are choosing to love a movie more than you love God. God wants us to love Him by obeying Him and one of the ways you obey God is by obeying Mommy and Daddy with a happy heart." It's scary to see the truth of what John Calvin said so clearly in the life of my own daughter. I am praying that God would give her a heart for Him SOON and so save her many years of pursuing broken cisterns.

But I've not been observing the truth of Calvin's assessment of the human heart in Katie's life alone. No, the issue of idolatry has hit home even more personally as it's come to the surface in my own life. For several days I had been experiencing great anxiety and sadness as I thought about the life change we are about to experience. I cried on Saturday morning thinking of how it was the last normal Saturday I would have in a while. I've been anxious about the difficulties we may face in the coming weeks, and I fear the freedoms I will have to relinquish. Clearly, there is much selfishness and unbelief at play here. But what I failed to see at first was the underlying issue of idolatry. I had been finding my joy in many things besides God (things like orderliness, sleep, predictability, my own agenda). I was feeling anxious and sad because my ability to possess and enjoy these other things was being threatened by Caroline's arrival. If I were truly finding my hope and joy in God, I would not be anxious because, even when she does arrive, He's not going anywhere and He's not changing! Plus, the hardships that I fear are the very means He wants to use to draw me closer to Himself, to experience more joy in Him. He is not content to let me sit back and "play with mud pies." No, He wants to use the birth of this child to restore REAL joy to me, joy that is in Him and that exists even when all other crutches are removed.

One of the main ways He revealed that all this was going on in my heart was by bringing to mind a song from my college days, "Enough" by Chris Tomlin. I am making that song my prayer now and longing to return to the place where I can sing these words from my heart.

You are my supply, My breath of life

And still more awesome than I know

You are my reward, worth living for

And still more awesome than I know

All of You is more than enough for all of me

For every thirst and every need

You satisfy me with Your love

And all I have in You is more than enough

You're my sacrifice Of greatest price

And still more awesome than I know

You're the coming King, You are everything

And still more awesome than I know

More than all I want, More than all I need

You are more than enough for me

More than all I know, More than all I can say

You are more than enough for me